At Free! Recovery the first welcome, as someone walked into the room, was, and still is, vital. Addictions and life-controlling behaviours flourish in isolation. Think about yourself for a moment; when you want to comfort yourself with, for example, food, do you raid the fridge or cupboard with your husband, wife or best friend watching. Why not? It doesn’t place you in the best of lights, does it? It shows vulnerability, it shows that perhaps you are not in control! You also do not want to be judged, or nagged. So many issues at play here!
Hello Family!
One guy walked through our doors and his very first words were always, “Hello Family!” He loved coming to our Thursday evenings. He found community, a place where he could just be himself and discover people struggling just like he struggled. For an evening he did not want or feel he needed to use. He found a group of people, who wanted to grow and change, and who wanted to have a purpose and an identity. He found an ultimate purpose and identity in Christ. He fell ill with cancer, Covid times came and we lost touch. However, we did not lose how much the “family” meant to him.
Hello Family!
A few years ago I wrote a dissertation called, “The Impact of a Biblical Understanding of Joy in the Lives of those Struggling with Addictive Behaviours.” Each participant had to do a bible devotion of joy for 8 weeks, with a weekly check in. Each participant had at least one life-controlling issue they were struggling with. They had all, in the past, made a commitment to Christ. One component I was exploring was the value of community in each of their lives. Community and relationships are a messy subject when it comes to relationships. Often there is such lack of trust and the experience of immense brokenness. Each participant reported that they valued a meal with close friends and reported less joy when alone. One aspect of Christian community is to grow in our relationship with Christ, and this is one vital component of Free! Recovery. As people learn to lean in on Christ throughout the day, isolation turns to being alone in Christ. As my elderly cousin in Switzerland says always, “I am never alone.” even though she spends most of her day separated from people. As the study grew over a few weeks, one aspect interested me; many reported less using of their particular habit, when they were consistently reading the Bible and praying. Participants may have been alone but they were moving away from the sense of being isolated and gaining strength in walking more in Christ. This resulted in less using, as reported very clearly by one of the cocaine users.
Connection and building relationships with other people and learning to grow together in Christ are significant components in a recovery ministry. Why is this so hard within a normal church setting, like, for example, a home group setting? Well, ideally, this should work. However, a congregation may not be ready for people with significant struggles to come through the door. They may not know how to talk with them, they may have some personal obstacles, like some prejudice to overcome. A congregation needs to grow and realise that they are not so far away from some of the choices that others have made. Connecting the dots may help. There may also be hidden “sins” within the congregation that a person does not want to reveal; the secretiveness of certain habits. Introducing people with really messy lives, might severely challenge the comfort of some of the congregation. However, to create real family in a church much work has to be done. A recovery group in a church can help towards this end; demonstrating community.
For more information on having a group in your church please contact us at . WE would love to have a chat with with you. Check out our events page at www.free-recovery.org/events/.
Sally Childress
Co-founder and resource developer for Free! Recovery
